Self Control

Personal development

Self-control is the ability to control oneself, in terms of having mastery over one’s desires and appetites. Those who are self-controlled can temper what they want, to ensure that they do not over- or under-indulge.

St Thomas Aquinas, a medieval philosophy and theologian, said that self-controlled people were able to ‘preserve their lives’. In other words, they were able to do the right things to keep themselves healthy and happy.

Three Habits of Self-Control

Self-controlled people can be thought of as having acquired three habits:

1. Self-Preservation

They have a healthy attitude towards ‘things’ and focus on what they need in order to live, rather than what they want. They use what they need to enrich their lives, but do not over-indulge. They do not try to exploit others in any way.

2. Self-Assertion

They know their own value, and are comfortable in saying what they think in a way that allows others to speak too. They are firm but gentle with others, and do not put themselves or others down.

3. Self-Fulfilment

The way to self-fulfilment is closely linked to resilience. Those with self-control are able to understand that it is important to persevere with difficult activities if you are to develop skill in them. However, if you do persevere, you will learn the skill and will get pleasure from it.

Examples of skills which may not come easily but which give huge pleasure include drawing and other forms of visual art, learning to play a musical instrument and studying a new subject for interest.

Fundamentally, self-control allows us to enjoy the good things of life in moderation, without wanting too much, and knowing when we have had enough.

Source skillsyouneed.com